Cast of That '90s Show

Leia has never been kissed, so Gwen suggests she go to the mall to make out with someone — maybe Jay? Sherri needs Red to break up with Fez (Wilmer ...

Mostly, this story line produces relief that it’s over, and looks unlikely to continue the extended-pilot vibes into the next episode. Too much of a softie to participate in Fez’s heartbreak, Kitty subcontracts out of her job and asks Red, who has spent much of the episode feeling uncharacteristically zen because of a Sharper Image massage chair, to let Fez down not so easy. “I don’t want to be some meaningless hookup,” he tells her, affirming her specialness and giving her a self-esteem boost in the process. Volunteering to help, Kitty makes an appointment at Fez’s salon; he’s remade himself in the image of a sexy stylist that seems equally inspired by Wilmer Valderrama’s dating history and You Don’t Mess With the Zohan. Callie Haverda has put some nicely awkward spins on her lines; in “Lip Smackers,” it’s funny to hear her accidentally confess her inexperience in the area of kissing by referring to tongues caressing uvulas (“The u-spot,” she adds). Gwen proposes an immediate solution: Head to the mall and “knock this out.” Cue the montage of Leia trying and failing to mack on the male population of the food court, intimidating an ice-cream scooper and accidentally hitting on a tall 9-year-old (“Hey, sexy, you eating grapes?”).