The other woman

Following the online reaction to Adam Levine's alleged cheating, journalist Rachel Thompson recounts her own experience being the 'other woman' – and ...

“The other woman is often seen as the monster because, traditionally, men are seen as the ‘protector’ of the woman or the family,” says Molloy. The other woman trope is a mechanism of the patriarchy, a weapon to divide rather than unite women. “It signals that someone’s needs are not being met and the only way they are able to communicate that is through their actions.” “The other woman is often seen as a homewrecker, causing havoc to happily coupled men and women, married couples and family units,” explains Molloy. We see birth control aimed at women when the number of possible pregnancies for a woman in nine months is one, but is technically unlimited for men.” [Sexologist Madalaine Munro](https://www.madalainemunro.com) tells me that our willingness to give “the (often male) cheater a free pass” is a continuation of the sexism that’s woven into the infrastructure of our society. Nyasha Junior writes in Dame magazine: “Jezebel’s is the age-old story of a woman who is regarded negatively for traits that often would be applauded in a man.” “It is also a symptom of a deeper issue that is exemplified through patterns of placing the responsibility on women for men’s actions. Yet, it was Stroh that TikTok was quick to turn on, with people in the comments chiming in to say: “U ain’t the victim, babe,” “Clout is one hell of a drug,” and “She holds no accountability,” to name a few. In contrast, when it came to the internet’s reaction to Levine, the memes and jokes flowed freely – the verdict was in: his horny messages were ‘deeply cringe’ to witness. At the time I was young, I was naive. A lot has happened in the 14 years since I made a mistake that upturned my entire life, but one thing that remains entirely the same is society’s vilification of ‘the mistress’ in heterosexual affairs.